Does size matter?

That’s the Question. Does the size on his penis matters to womans’ sexual pleasure? It is, I have heard, a scary question to ask because men tend to identify with their genitals.

I have slept with three men. Or more like two boys and one man. Anyway, they naturally had different ways of reacting to physical contact and they were not built the same. In my opinion, average is perfect. I have experienced that if the guy is really big, he hardly react to anything but his penis. Everything turns around it and it can be pretty annoying when you try to give head and the only technique that seems to turn him on is sucking. I mean, it’s so much more fun when you can work him up in other ways, like licking him on the inside of his legs, the area between the anus and his balls, or just the head. I love it when I can bite his neck and he moans with pleasure. It really gives me confidence and makes me want to do other stuff. It ca also be because he knows he’s that big, he have never done any real effort to please a woman in bed, as the myth the bigger the better is out there. Just to make things clear, we usually come much harder from stimulation of the clitoris, and not the penetration itself. I can’t stress this enough.

Does it feels better during sex if he’s big? In my experience, not really. It’s more about how excited I am than his size. When I am extremely turned on and longing for having him inside me, the sex mostly is great. Mostly. South Park reference!

In conclusion, it’s all about how the girl is worked up, rather than size. It may be a cliché, but foreplay really makes the difference. And remember, we fall in love with a man, not a penis, even though it’s a package deal.  

Love Mandy

If a girl…

…asks you to give her a reason to stay, it means two things:

1. The obvious: she wants to hear the three little words “I love you” and she wants them to be true.

2. She is willing to change a part of her life for you which means that she, at this precise moment, thinks that you might be the one. She only needs some sort of confirmation because she is a person with selfesteem.

Love Mandy

The Porn Generation

The author of one of the blogs I read, seems deeply upset about a phenomene Arte, which is a French television station, made a documentary about some weeks ago. Just for the record, the blog is written in French, and just to clear things up, I am not French, I only speak and understand the language. The phenomene is described as The Porn Generation and is basiclyabout the influence porn may have on young people’s sex life. As porn has got more accesible to the masses on the Internet, the documentary shows that the porn generation will tend to reproduce what they see in porn on the behalf of sexual pleasure. The journalists interviewed especially one girl at my age who apparently consuming the opposite sex. She explains that she meets boys, then sleep with them and move on to the next. The is not exactly dating involved. Just good old fashionable f***ing. Later on, the same girl went out and explained that what she was saying was taken completely out of proportions and that she was told to exaggerate.

Since the girl and I are practically at the same age, I should by definition belong to this Porn Generation and I therefore feel that I have some explaining to do. I think she has a point when she says that today, men are not the only ones who are screwingaround. In fact, the differences between the sexes when it comes to sex, dating, hurting people, are shrinking. I think the social bonds which say that the male is the hunter and the female is supposed to be the one he hunts down, still are there, but they are beingpushed. This is not necessarily a bad thing.

Now, when it comes to the part where we, the porn generation, is supposed to imitate what we see in porn films and not really care about sexual pleasure, my experience is that, yes, we tend to try out things we see in these movies. But, and this is quite important, that does not mean we are not searching pleasure. Personally, my first sexual fantasies were based on what I had read in crime literature by Ken Follet. To me, it seems quite obvious that later on, I wanted to reproduce these fantasies. Let’s imagine a person whose first sexual fantasy was based on something he or she had seen in a porn film. You cannot deny that because of the accessibility, it may be more likely that young people today find their sexual material on the Internet than at the library. It seems pretty clear to me that that person would try some things he or she had seen on the screen out in real life.

Just to draw a parallel to my own experience, I think Boy was like that. He sometimes used to slap my butt. Yes, this may sound a bit weird, but once when we were fooling around on his bed, he slap my butt. Ever since, he has continued doing that. Not too often and not hard, but still. When I asked him if he did this because he had seen it in a porn film, he told me that the answer to that question was obvious. When I posed about this, I got the answer from a reader that “we want the reaction like the hot blond porn star”. I guess boys will be boys…

Just to make things clear, this does not mean that Boy and I had hardcore S/M sex. Quite the opposite actually. Nor does this mean that members of The Porn Generation constantly are imitating porn without having any pleasure. What it means that some of our fantasies that we try out in bed MAY be based on porn. Is this chocking? I think not. At the same time, it is not sure that walking around on this earth for 19 years qualifies my judgement 😛

Love Mandy

Doin’ da Girl

I don’t think I have met one of my friends who has not fantasized about sleeping with another woman. It has gone on for centuries, but I remember that when I was in my early teens, the medias brought up this subject like it was something new and chocking. For those who hasn’t got it yet, I hate to break it down: this is not exactly news.

Why does women fanasize about being with another woman?

First of all, it is pretty much accepted in society. It is OK to for two women to experimente with each other. For men on the other hand, it still is more taboo. Women and the female body is, even though we would like to think otherwise, still used in a sensual way in the medias to for example sell toothpaste, cars, shower-gel, hardware or food. In a way, we are forced to see the female body as not only an object, but a pretty attractive one. We could therefore say that it is quite common for women to look at each other and feel attracted to one and other.

Second, women are generally more attractive than men. Don’t get me wrong. Men sure are attractive, but there are different kinds of beauty. Women are sensual and feminine. They generaly take care of themselves and value themselves more than men do. I guess it is the difference, the excitement of something new, but at the same time familiar that is really the issue. Kissing a man is sexy. Kissing a woman is sensual. It isn’t quite the same thing, but that really is the thrill.

Third, even though the media to a certain level encourages girl on girl action, the excitement of being with a woman is also based on the feeling of doing something unorthodox. Maybe this does not reflect reality, but I like to think I am doing something “wrong” when I am with a girl. Good girls aren’t supposed to sleep with each other and even less enjoy it. Even though it certainly is more accepted than ever, I still would like to think I am breaking a taboo being with a girl. What is forbidden is exciting.

Forth, women knows how to satisfy another woman, simply because we share pretty much of the same anatomy. We both love spending hours on foreplay and don’t pass out after the first orgasm, leaving the other unsatisfied. In my experience, women are more thoughtful in bed than men when it comes to this. If our partner, woman or man, has not come yet, we don’t give in just because our own needs are filled. I would not like to generalize this statement, but this is my impression all over. Take it for what it is worth.

 

After Boy broke up with me, I have done some sleeping around. Not much though. Actually just one f*** and one kind of walk-in-the-park-date with a guy that I know would like to go out with me. Most likely, he is serious. Anyway, I am not ready for a relationship. Actually, I am fantasizing about sleeping with a girl. I have already kissed one and sort of fooled around. Nothing really exciting though. I won’t say more, but it may be realised pretty soon. More to come 😛

Love Mandy