He brought me coffee and a croissant!

I slept at D’s place last night. It seems like our time together is just filled with passion for one another. I enjoy it so much, and without further ado, i guess you could say he does too..

Last night he put on some nice, calm music and welcomed me with a kiss. Just coming in to the room made me feel so at home and turned on. He started kissing my neck and slowly emerged downwards. He kissed my shoulders gently and undressed me smoothly. I don’t usually just lie there, but last night I gave in to the passion of being passive. And man, it’s nice to be passive sometimes. Lieing there being fumbled with, being touched, being fucked gently and hard at the same time. MY GOD, that’s passion for me! ( I came twice, just for the record!!)

To put it mildly, I am not the typical morning person, I am pretty sure my friends, and especially my roomie can vouch for that. I heard him leave this morning, and figured he was going to the bathroom or something. Then about 15 minutes later he comes home with coffee and croissants. This is probably one of the sweetest things you can do for a girl in the morning, bringing her coffee and breakfast. Needless to say, he is adorable and I am falling.

With kisses of coffee and a little croissant, a little bit of sunshine and with lots of love, Betty!!

Having trouble sleeping

Co-worker, let’s just call him F from now on, has moved into his new apartment. He did it yesterday and he invited me over after work the same day. I accepted and the plan was that we shouldn’t watch any movies because in that way, I would be able to catch the last subway home. But it didn’t work out as I had planed. We watched a movie, talked, drank wine and before we had actually noticed anything, it was too late for me to go home. Since he has just one room in the apartment and also just one bed, be slept together that night. Anyways, we tried to sleep, but we stayed up talking for hours. We passed out in the same bed and nothing happened.

He hasn’t tried to make a move, not even once. It’s weird. Or no, it’s not. It probably just means that he is not interested. But if that’s the case, it’s really too bad. I like him a lot. He’s great. Really great and I have started to have some seriously erotic dreams about him. This is hard. That’s what she said!I think I am falling, crushing to the ground. On the same time, I keep getting these mixed signals, the looks, something that makes me think that he may just be shy, which I know he is.

By the way, he told me this morning that while I was asleep, I had had some trouble falling asleep because he’d forgot to eat. Suddenly, he thought something dead had fallen on his head, but when he looked closer, it was my hand. In my sleep I had just reached out and put my hand on his head. Charming…

Love Mandy

Hey there mr…

Oh, so you have a girlfriend, GREAT!!

Ok, so I have this problem, well actually I have two.. I ended up hooking up with Mr. GF! Mr. GF is from France, have a thick, sexy, french accent and is so adorable. I had met him before and found him attractive and liked hanging out with him, but I knew he had a GF and therefore I stayed away. His GF attended the same school as we do.. She was here on a research scholarship and went back home a couple of weeks ago.

Knowing all of this, I met him on Halloween, we were at the same party and had a lot of fun. The party ended up at the next-door frat and I ended up drinking (which I wasn’t supposed to since I was ill…) Mr. GF and I ended up sitting and chatting, and getting more and more drunk. I didn’t have any intentions, knowing what I did. After about an hour talking (or so, remember I was drunk, keeping head of time isn’t really my thing while drunk) he leans towards me, and kiss me…. Oh GOOOOOD!!! We ended up going home to his place, and I guess everyone can think of what happened next…

In the morning when I left he told me to add him on FB, which I didn’t do, and a couple of days later, he added me instead. I didn’t want to take the first step, because he has a GF and because I therefore don’t feel it’s right of me. That same day I got a message saying he had a great time with me, and he hoped to see me soon. Gave me his msn-adress and his phonenumber. I was stunned. Here I am, trying to get people to stay in touch, and when I do not expect it, nor really know how ethically right it is, I get contact… (The sex was great btw, there is something about boy which resently, or currently is in a relationship is so good in bed and know just the right things to do…)

What I’m asking you all, is: Is it right of me to stay in touch? Or should I just blow him off… Keep in mind I do really think he’s a sweet, nice guy, that I don’t want a BF and that I can see he’s being a jerk for doing this to his GF…

My other problem is…. Did I mention the guy on my floor liking me? The one I ended up kissing even though I only saw him as a friend? Well, I think I’m falling for him. I really enjoy spending time with him, and I caught myself flirting with him yesterday, and kinda wanted to kiss him (I WAS SOBER!!) I have no idea how to handle this as I have convinced myself (and everyone else for that matter) that he is only a friend, and that even though I know he fancies me, I didn’t want to do something with him.. I’m falling, I can feel it, and I don’t know how to handle it… Help me???

Looooove Betty Boop Boop Boop!!!

Goofing around

Once again I was invited to co-worker’s apartment. He made we a wonderful meal. I am not just saying it to be nice, it was really great. We talked a lot and he is just extraordinary. Then, I kind of planed to make my move, he asked me if I wanted to watch a movie. I said sure and he started the grossest film I have ever seen. It is made by an Italian and it is called something like 120 days in sodora, I do not really remember the name. Anyway, if you are familiar with the saw-films, I can tell you that this one was 100 times worse: men and women being sexually abused, tortured and forced to eat crap. I kind of agreed to watch it and I sort of knew what it was about, but I had no idea it would be so bad. I mean, the plot reminded me of Battle Royale, only in Battle Royale the horrors has a purpose. Here it was completely random and insane. Needless to say, a movie like this does NOT make you want to make a move.

When it was finished, we discovered that it was 02.30 in the morning. Once again I slept in his bed. He made me breakfast in the morning and absolutely nothing happened. The next evening we goofed around at work. And the evening after that as well.

I really like this guy…

Love Mandy

The other

My friendship with co-worker has reached the point where we have opened up to the other about our love-life situation. And guess what. He has been in love with a girl for 3 years. We were talking about a journalist our age who writes for a journal we both like. He told me he had met the journalist trough a girl he “had been in love with” for 3 years. To this information he added: “I think we have kind of the same problem.” I have earlier briefly mentioned my ended relationship with boy to him and that I now have cut off all contact with him. And I guess I said something about doing quite fine even if I maybe shouldn’t. That probably explains co-worker’s last statement even though it isn’t really a problem anymore. Boy is history and I am actually quite fine with it.

Anyway, this probably means that he still is on love with her and in that case, it would be stupid for me to make a move. A part of me is realised because now, I do not need to get myself together and kiss him, but the other part is, I hate to admit it, jealous. Co-worker explained me what he is reading in philosophy (that is what he is studying at the university) and I couldn’t help but thinking that the girl he is in love with must be someone extraordinary simply because he is such a great, cool, interesting and handsome person. I consider myself as a good girl and someone easy to be in a relationship with, but I may be a little afraid of not being able to compete with a person like that. It is also possible that I make up this perfect version of her in my head, something which is quite easy since I don’t know her at all.

On the other hand, there is a small possibility that he is no longer in love, or that he is heartbroken. I do not know how that is any better though. Maybe it isn’t. One thing is at least sure: now I really don’t know what to do!

Love Mandy 

PS. School and work is killing me. It cannot go on like this. I cannot study 8 hours a day and then work 7 hours in the evening/ at night. Just had to get that out. Most likely, I will just continue working my butt off.

Falling in love again

I have been wondering, what make me fall in love with one particular person and not another? When it comes to this, I think I have had a pattern for the last few years. It scares me. Every time, the boy wanted to go out with me and since I did not really have anything else to do, I guess I thought something like “why not” and just went out with him. Then, things became more serious, I fell in love with him and we became a couple. But not necessarily in that order.

I have asked myself if I fall in love only because the guy is nice with me. I told this to a friend and she pointed out that it was better to fall in love with someone who actually is nice, rather than an asshole. That would be a bit sadomaso. But honestly, I do not fall in love with someone just because he shows interest in me. At the moment, I think I am falling in love with co-worker because of many things. He has the qualities I am looking for in a man: nice, we can talk about anything, funny, has a great smile, is handsome, intelligent, mature (this one is quite important), has no issues and he is all over a happy guy. Yesterday he came to the restaurant where I work. My boss (his father) was out and I had the responsibility for all of it. Anyway, we folded napkins and talked. Nothing else, but we are planing to go to the movies again and I help him in his French class at the University (oh… so romantic). I have experienced that working together and helping someone at school actually is a great way to get close to another person.

Love Mandy